I'd like some char kway teow fresh from the wok please. Proper traditional char kway teow mind you, not the modern versions that try and pass themselves off as the real thing... that means it needs to have been fried with pork lardons and not vegetable oil, with the lard working its way into the noodles and the lardons becoming crispy little nuggets of heaven (apologies to any practicing Jews/Muslims, but there's nothing like crispy lardons). And it's got to be with duck eggs, not normal chicken eggs. Oh, and proper sambal.