BA764, 12th July 2016
Dep: LHR London Heathrow Terminal 5 10:25 (local time)
Arr: OSL Oslo Gaerdermoen 13:40 (local time)
Flight length: 750 miles, 2 hours 15 minutes
Operated by: British Airways (Airbus A319-131,G-EUPK)
Seat: 6A (Euro Traveller)
Trivia: This made OSL my most visited airport outside of the UK

We pick up the thread barely a month later – but what a month it was for the UK, as the Brexit vote threw everything into turmoil. Political manoeuvring went into overdrive, the markets went into nosedive, and England (in particular) became a much less enjoyable place to be an immigrant. The morning I set off for Heathrow, we had at least established who our new prime minister would be, but there was very little sense of how the rest of it would shake out.

First order of business at Heathrow – collecting some appropriate currency – was an illustration in point. The rate I’d got back in February was fully 15% better, although at least ordering online saved me £11 (for around £150 of kronor) compared to the walk-up rate.

As a lowly blue travelling with hold luggage and having put this leg in economy, I had my pick of four equally lengthy bag drop queues. Stretching past one turn of the tensa barrier maze and halfway to the next one, it took fifteen minutes to reach a desk. Fortunately north security was a much swifter experience, with most of the five minutes occupied with lacing myself out of and in to my (hopefully) Arctic-proof walking boots.

The BA lounge monopoly at T5 has finally been broken by the arrival of the Aspire Lounge and Spa – it was here the last time I passed through, but back then I didn’t have priority pass. It’s a very small setup – generally, not just compared to the vast galleries complexes - with seating on the outer edge of an L-shaped walkway wrapping around the spa, bar and food. But hey, free is free, and I do manage to get a seat - with a view of some planes, Wi-Fi, a trio of UK/European/USB charging points, and rather more peace and quiet than the main terminal. Hot breakfast offerings seemed reasonable at first glance, although the eggs turned out to be terrible and I couldn’t find a glass of water! Would I use it again? Sure. Would I pay for it, or leave early specifically to get more time here? No. Still, with 15 tier points to my name this year I suspect I’ll be here often enough…



I reach the gate at 9:57, just as they’re calling golds for boarding (so, being at the very bottom of the status totem pole, I take a seat). Gate A8 is pretty small, but for a Tuesday morning A319 service to Oslo it seemed sufficient – by coincidence my previous Heathrow departure, to Edinburgh, was served from the same gate and it clearly wasn’t enough space for that.

Sadly, it took 15 minutes from joining the queue to reaching the jet bridge – ten of them spent immediately behind the passengers being processed. Or not being processed, as it seems they were part of a group of 12, for which the hold bag assignments had been mangled by FLY. Besides the need to reconcile ownership, some of them were assigned so many that the system was now looking for extra baggage fees to be levied. Unhelpfully, part of the group – specifically, the guy with all the bag drop receipts – was already on board. Even less helpfully, the group had split across both boarding lanes so now neither agent could / would deal with anyone else. A FLY specialist was on hand to unravel it all, but still not an impressive first encounter with the system for me!

Fortunately no one else in my row had made it through ahead of me, so there was no need for acrobatics to reach my window seat, 6A. With five rows of Club Europe, this was the first Euro Traveller seat – once upon a time this was a useful thing to snag, as it guaranteed an empty middle space and usually meant decent legroom. Post densification, it’s no different to the others, but I still grab it out of habit – and it seemed better than the aisle seat way down the back of the bus I’d found myself assigned during online check-in.





Doors closed at 10:25 –our scheduled departure time - but we were advised there was quite a bit of congestion and to expect 20 minutes of queueing for a take-off slot. Ten minutes elapsed before we pushed back, and sure enough we went for a drive around seemingly the entire Heathrow complex before lining up for launch a smidge before 11.



Food turned up promptly, presumably because we were the front row of economy, but the size of this band 3 brunch offering is just embarrassing. It was well presented, and having not read the packaging I was pleasantly surprised by the salt-caramel filling of the ‘muffin’, which was genuinely good, just more cupcake in scale. The roll – cold chicken and bacon – tasted ok, but it’s all of two mouthfuls. At the time BA’s plans to roll out buy on board for shorthaul had not been officially announced; this is due for early 2017, and based on this miserly offering can’t come too soon (although I’d have preferred it if they kept drinks free, even though I personally don’t take anything more exciting that water).



At 11:50 the pilot took to the mic to advise us that we were at 39 thousand feet and he had put the foot down, flying at maximum safe speed to try to make up for the endless Heathrow taxi. The estimate was for arrival at 13:45 local i.e. just under the hour, which would put us only a few minutes behind schedule. They were also optimistic about the weather.

In the even we actually arrived in Oslo even faster than predicted, touching down at 13:39 local; appreciated as by now I was finding the slimline seat rather uncomfortable. As always, Norwegian scenery unrolling beneath us was beautiful, but that weather forecast seemed less convincing as we made a bumpy descent through gathering storm clouds.



The seatbelt sign popped off at 13:47 and I’d cleared immigration a little over ten minutes later, most of that due to hiking across the airport rather than queuing or any questioning.

My bag had apparently made slower progress from the plane, taking another 25 minutes to appear on the belt, with the tag ripped off and zips partially open.

I have to explain the concept of queuing at the ticket machine for the trains but these are a doddle to use – they even give advice on the appropriate platform and time remaining until the next suitable departure for your destination. I’ve opted for the local service rather than the faster – but painfully expensive – Flytoget express, but I’ve made a good connection and although busy the train delivers me to Oslo Centrum according to schedule and still with plenty of the afternoon left to explore.