Preface 1: I'm tall, so I need legroom. I'm also very broad shouldered. So broad, in fact, that my shoulders are actually wider than a coach class seat and encroach upon anyone I'm next to.

Preface 2: Due to an incident earlier this year, I have a torn rotator cuff and a dislocated AC joint, and thus need reconstructive shoulder surgery. I can do almost anything with it, but I'll pay for it later. I also have significant knee damage on the same side, and will need reconstructive knee surgery. I can walk, but it's a pretty noticeable limp and I have to wear a brace until I can find time to get fixed up.

Preface 3: Knowing these details, I make a point to book first class only or, if that is not possible, row 17, aisle only. If I can't? Then I adjust my travel schedule till I can.

So I flew from SEA>RDU today on one of the new 738's with the 3 row FC configuration. I booked quite some time ago, to the point where I had my choice of all but 1 of the seats in FC. Yay new stuff! I sat in my seat. I marveled at the amount of legroom I was presented with. It rivaled Qantas SYD>LAX legroom back before they went to pods. It was lovely. I was in for a comfortable flight.

Then, after about 5 minutes, somebody boarded the plane. This somebody informed me that they had "overbooked" first class, and that they were going to have to demote me to coach. Whaaaat? I explained to them that this had to be a mistake - I didn't get a "free" upgrade - my ticket cost more than just going base fare and getting a 72 hour upgrade. Unmoved. I pointed out that it's medically necessary for me to have the extra space. I pointed to my leg with the bulky brace protruding out of it. I explained the torn rotator cuff and how I really shouldn't be doing funny business with my shoulders.

To coach he sent me. To an exit row? Oh nay, gentle readers. To an aisle? Negatory. How about a window? Nope. A @#&$ING middle seat in the....whatever they're calling the economy plus section! I guess if I'm gonna get bumped, they figure they might as well bump me all the way down rather than do right. Somehow, in the span of about 30 seconds, I had gone from being in a seat I had paid for quite some time ago to being wedged between two large people in coach. I said surely Alaska is not going to treat someone who has been a gold or 75k for a number of years in such a way, especially given medical situations. A very nice flight attendant - incredulous at how something like that could happen, located a window seat for me - in the very back of the bus. Sadly, I couldn't flex my leg at all back there, and since it was window, I'd have to get up every 20 minutes to try and keep somewhat limber. So that wouldn't work.

Ultimately, they ended up putting me in row 16....in the middle. In spite of my repeated statements that, medically, this isn't a good idea for me and if they're going to pull this stunt, I'd much rather them book me FC on another carrier to get me to Raleigh. That got me nowhere. Of course, by this point, the plane was full - including the underfoot areas in my row.

SO....I had the pleasure of spending 5 hours with a bad shoulder....having to crunch my shoulders forward in order to fit in the seat in the middle of a plane. My leg had the pleasure of being almost incapable of moving for the entirety of the flight, except for the couple of times I couldn't take the pain anymore and got up and walked for a moment. Somewhere in the midst of all these musical chairs, the stylus that attaches to my Surface Pro 4 Tablet that I was having to lug out in the open throughout the plane (as I had to leave my carry-on in the overhead bin in row 2 thanks to the rest of the bins being full) fell off and was not recovered, so there's 60 bucks out the window. My company travel policy does not permit purchasing add-ons on the plane (such as food) and, since I was booked first class, I didn't bother to eat brekkie in the airport as I figured I'd eat on the plane (and in spite of this cascade of Alaska failures, they saw fit to not offer to comp me one of those Lola bowls), so the first thing I put in my stomach all day (other than the 2 percocet I took on the plane because the pain was getting to be quite a bit - today I learned empty stomachs don't like percocet...) was at like 6 o clock in the evening.

Fast forward to present time. Here it is, almost 3 am, and I'm wide awake in my hotel because after 2 more percocet and 2 vicodin, my shoulder is still absolutely killing me from having to flex and scrunch it for 5 #@$&ing straight hours, I can barely walk without my leg giving out and me wanting to howl in pain and, instead of going in to work tomorrow with my tight deadline, I'm going to have to seek out some form of medical attention and massage therapy in a city I'm merely visiting (and I know from prior experience of pushing it too far that it's going to be like this for days). You know, supposing I'm not so exhausted from not sleeping that I'm even safe to drive.

But hey, it's cool - they're going to put some miles in my account. Probably the same amount of miles they give when a checked bag doesn't arrive in 20 minutes. Oh, and be "generous" enough to refund me the difference between the FC fare I paid for and the coach seat they threw me in, even though I booked that fare for a reason.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a shining example of how you take a guy who has been Gold or 75K for a number of years spanning a few different accounts and, in one fell swoop, erase every ounce of goodwill you have ever built up and chase him off to your biggest competitor in Seattle. I mean, bump someone from SEA to LAS or SAN or LAX or something? Maybe it's not the end of the world. But a fricking transcon?! I can put up with quite a bit, but the intentional infliction of physical pain upon a customer? There's no coming back from that. And I only had that stylus for about 12 hours - and would have never lost it had they not jiggered me all over the damn plane and put me in a situation where I couldn't pack it into my bag, because the bag had to stay where it was.

@#&$ that. Delta it is.