OK -- I know this is civil disobedience and I apologize to everyone out there who has a real disability.

When I went through the NOS at Dulles a year or so ago, I had put a crumpled paper towel near my "private area." Sure enough, an "anomaly" showed up on the Gumby screen. The clerk asked about the "anomaly" before he started his "pat-down" and I told him I had a medical condition. When that didn't satisfy him, I said (loud enough for other male & female clerks and fellow passengers to hear): "I have genital warts caused by years of unprotected sex. They are really oozing right now." Needless to say, I was released from the checkpoint without further screening.