Just trying to be a voice of reason here-
To start, take the pink tag, smile, say NOTHING, shove it in your pocket on the gangway and take your bag on board anyway. It's what the pros do.

- it seems silly not to just make a gmail.com address rather than trying to shove a square peg into a round hole. It's not "fake" it's just what would work
- you're getting very good advice here, a few people brought up that you sound angry and should stay calm, they are saying that for a reason