I've had mixed experiences with high-end hotels.

For me it usually comes down to service. The best hotels pick up every little detail even if you don't explicitly mention it (and they remember those details when you stay in the future).

For example when I stayed at the PH Sydney, my bags were heavy with wine I'd picked up in New Zealand and Australia. I apologized to the porters taking the bags out of the taxi for the weight citing the wine. The next night a nice bottle of Australian Shiraz was left for me in the room with a note from the manager. He mentioned that he "heard I was big wine fan and he wanted me to try one of his personal favorites from the hotel collection"

That right there is what makes a high-end hotel a high-end hotel. The finishes, the beds, etc., are all fairly standard but it is the personal service and attention to detail that really takes a hotel from being just another expensive hotel to being a truly high-end hotel.