FlyerTalk Forums - View Single Post - “Do You Know Who I Am?”: The Definitive Thread of DYKWIA Stories
Old Feb 12, 16, 9:25 am
A FlyerTalk Posting Legend
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Yiron, Israel
Programs: Bates Motel Plat
Posts: 62,874
DYKWIAs are not found only on airplanes. I had an encounter with one this week in a parking lot in a shopping mall.

Given the great weather we usually have here, most malls are strip malls. One in my area, is not, and as it was both cold and raining, this mall suddenly became very popular and its parking lot was almost completely full.

When I pulled in, there were two spots left -- both in the furthest end of the parking lot and next to each other.

A car in front of me pulled into the first one. Actually, that is not quite true. It pulled into 80% of one parking space and 20% of the only other remaining space -- the one I planned on parking in.

I asked the driver, a rather overweight woman, if she could please move her car to allow me room to park mine. She told me she has the right to park however she wants and walked off.

I then managed to squeeze my car in. I left about 2 inches between the passenger door on my car and the driver's door on hers. I had no problem getting out of my car as my door opened onto a sidewalk. I then went into the mall, ate lunch there, did some shopping, and came back to my car.

I was not at all surprised to see the woman who had taken much of my parking space standing there. There was no possible way she could have gotten into her car from the driver's side and, at her weight, I really did not expect her to be able to enter from the passenger side, manage to get over the stick shift on the floor, and sit in the driver's seat.

She had obviously been waiting for me for quite a bit of time as she was soaking wet and furious. She started to give me hell until I pointed out that I was parked between the lines of my parking space and she was the one who had been greedy.

I wished her a nice day, then took my time starting my car, getting the radio tuned to my preferred station, adjusting my mirrors (which were already in place), making certain that my headlights were turned on, and v e r y s l o w l y pulling out to be certain that my side view mirror did not hit hers.

All of this time, of course, she had absolutely no choice but to stand in the rain.

DYKWIAs of the world, be warned: Revenge is sweet!
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