If Meredith Clayton travels more than 100,000 miles per year you'd think that by now he'd be able to tell a "Heathrow Express" sign (they're even printed on the floors of the terminals!!) from an "Underground" sign.

The "main" London airport is LHR, with Gatwick a not-too close second. LGW used to be the charter "bucket and spade brigade" airport, but that changed over the years as BA bought BCal and Dan Air and established a huge presence there.

The most relaxing airport is Stansted, now home to Ryanair and Go, and normally STN is a 45 minute train ride from Liverpool Street station in the City.