I didn't read all 5 pages, but if anyone at United is reading this, i will add my two cents that the number of announcements are ridiculous and in some flights with 3 languages it is incessant assault of noise. I have noted some flight attendants which extend their announcements even further with completely useless blather just to hear themselves talk. There is a guy on the DXB-IAD flights that talks about the functioning of the air conditioning on board, the function of the IFE, and the variety of duty free selections blah blah blah.

But the worst of all is automated Mr. Seatbelt voice that comes booming over the PA system waking me up 5 times on the short-ride from IAD-DUB. (yes i do have ear plugs in before anyone offers me a link to amazon). There is also the ban on children announcement in a certain row. No one is listening, cares or processes it. Why don't the FA's just enforce it quietly as opposed to blathering endlessly on the PA about rare circumstances that they could just handle with the victims/customers.

I have been on lufthansa flights where the announcement took about 45 seconds, with the seatbelt sign off for most of the flight and the flights were actually enjoyable and quiet.