FlyerTalk Forums - View Single Post - “Do You Know Who I Am?”: The Definitive Thread of DYKWIA Stories
Old Aug 8, 14, 4:56 pm
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: South Central US
Programs: UA Lifetime GS, AA EXP 1 MM, Delta Diamond, Hilton Diamond, SPG Plat, Hyatt Gold, Hertz 5Star PC
Posts: 181
Oh this one had me laughing the entire flight.

Flew out of LAX to east coast this morning. While boarding, Mr. Self Important comes walking up to SP lane while GA is boarding first class. He steps over the velvet ropes and hands the GA his boarding pass. He's Zone 3, middle seat at the back of the plane and he let everyone know he wasn't happy.

"I flew over 3,000 miles on this *#&@ airline last year and the least they can give me is a good seat!" GA, who had that "don't mess with me" look, told him she was boarding first class and then elites and he could board with his zone and not before. All I could do was snicker thinking that 3,000 miles would not even cover a week of my schedule next week. Meantime, Mr. Self Important is getting angrier and starts to use filth. The passenger in front of me, a rather tall and muscular gentleman, told him to watch his mouth. After a police officer came over to watch the proceedings, Mr. Self Important shut his mouth and left. I boarded the plane.

During the end of the boarding, Mr. Self Important came onto the plane nearly last, and grabbed a PDB off the FA's tray meant for a FC passenger. He told her that he "deserved it for all of the trouble your *#&@ airline caused me!" and started slinking back to his seat. Up stood the tall muscular gentleman again, and this time he told Mr. Self Important to stop bothering people and if he didn't, maybe he would like some time in the hoosegow to think about his rudeness. Turns out Mr. Muscles must have been a FAM. Mr. Self Important started to say something, but looked at the size of Muscles and shut his trap.

We could hear him complaining all the way to the east coast about how he had been treated, how could they not serve him a meal or a free drink to make up for their treatment of him, blah blah blah. My next seat neighbor, a woman traveling to see her first grandchild, asked if there were always nasty customers like him. I assured her that there was at least one moron per flight and it was just a matter of time before they outed themselves with bad behavior. We laughed ourselves silly and enjoyed serial Bloody Marys.

Best time I've had watching an idiot DYKWIA-wannabe in a long time.
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