I have to say, this sounds like bad planning all around:

1. Weather. Maybe the OP got a bit of a bad draw, but the weather was not atypical for the time of the year. That is knowable.

2. Crowds. The main complaint seems to have been with the railways. A little more advance planning could have gotten reserved seats to Hualien and Ruifeng (on the way to Pingxi). And the Pingxi line can be crowded though one can always take a cab around (or do the whole trip by cab). The complaint doesn't even seem to have been with the places that really are crowded (night markets, Jiufen, etc.), but where the crowds are part of the experience.

3. Food. Seriously, waiting 30 minutes is too long? Especially when in a mall, probably for Din Tai Fung with a buzzer so you could walk around. I can understand not wanting to wait maybe an hour for what I assume was Fu Hang Dou Jiang, but then find another shaobing youtiao place instead. Not that hard. If you really want English menus, then research some places with English menus. Making the rounds of the guidebook places would still be really good eating. And some shaved ice of course.