My personal rules :
1. The photographer will not tell me how to post and where my flowers should go. He or she should understand it's my wedding and it should fit my style.
2. She or he will not spend hours taking group photos. I'm not in high school anymore.
3. Photos should reflect the mood of that day. I want to see my family / friends and their real emotion.
4. She or he should work quietly in the background, not stopping actions and sticking camera in your face.

I have these rules because I'm so sick of most wedding photographers. They boss people around, becomes the drama queen, and dragging the photo sessions on forever. For my wedding, we ended up getting a photo journalistic guy and he was great. Most of my photos are spontaneous and fun. Even after all these years, friends still ask to see our albums. Brings back joy.

Congrad by the way. Good luck.