Nothing here is news, except the groping. The OP is listed as EXP, so he/she should know what AA FAs are like.

There's not a big difference between domestic and international FA attitudes. They are not the worst, but far from the best. Unusual requests (such as removing the tray right away) are rarely honored. Certainly there is no "Yes to anything" service on AA. I haven't seen that attitude consistently on CX either, although of course CX is better overall. Try asking for anything non-standard on BA, you'll feel like Oliver Twist. (I recall asking for a second bottle of water.) QR probably comes closest to the OP's fantasy.