Ok, God hates me. I know he does.
So I end up canceling the BOS-SJU flight. Or at least I think I did. Stupid fare is non refundable. Which explains a lot. So I make my way to AA and ask the nice lady how much to change my Saturday flight back to DEN to this morning. As in 2 days early.
She taps away. And taps some more. Then she gets out an Abacus. And then calls someone with a Cray supercomputer.
Quotes me a number which I surely thought was a mistake. I didn't want to pay off her mortgage, I just wanted get home in time for Halloween. I told the kids I was going to answer the door in the nude and hand out candy. Kids as usual rolled their eyes. Wife said if I wanted to spend the next 15 years in a Colorado SuperMax prison, then I should go right ahead.
Reluctantly I hand over my AA credit card, thinking that the only ray of sunshine to come out of this entire sordid ordeal was the miles I would collect.
End up sitting in a middle exit row all the way to ORD - and happened to be beside an old boiler and an extremely attractive young female, who smelt terrific. Is that creepy? I don't think so...
We get to ORD without too much trouble. Even land a few minutes early. I have 2+ hours to kill before my last leg to DEN and decide to calm my nerves with a mainly Margherita fueled lunch.
Then the silly AA phone system starts hassling my iPhone. For the life of me I have no idea how to turn off that feature. The bad part is that if you're on an early flight (say 6.30am), the system calls you at 3.12am precisely, waits for you to hit the roof screaming, because you fell out of bed looking for the phone and then proceeds to tell you that your flight is on time. Drives you nuts.
So there I am, minding my own business at the bar of this Mexican Cantina joint, when I instantly recognise the AA phone number...
"This is American Airlines with a flight update. We're sorry to tell you that your flight to Denver is cancelled. So to be frank, your SOL. We have no idea what to do now"
And then hangs up.
So I call them. The EXP line. Nice woman tells me she can get me on a 1.02pm flight on UA. I politely tell the agent that I have just had 3 of the strongest Margheritas in my life and I would be amazed if I could get down off the bar stool, let alone make it through my 4th security screening for the day.
So she tells me next AA flight is 4.50pm. Which is an eternity away.
I bailed from the lunch place and am now holed up in the Admirals Club.
I've made a hotel booking at the Airport. Just in case.
If I ever see any of you again, remind me as to why we do this to ourselves...