I agree. It was unnecessary, condescending, mostly boilerplate.

Empathy can't be achieved but cutting and pasting a few hundred extra 'nice' words. If they had real empathy, they would not have needed to talk about so many unrelated topics just to fill space with empathetic words.

Curious - If a PAX has certain baggage rights giving them free baggage on UA and UA puts them on another flight due to a UA-fault delay, is the PAX responsible for paying the baggage fees to the other carrier? Or, what if PAX paid UA for baggage fees then has to pay the other carrier for fees a second time?

The fact that QF forced PAX (a 73 year old woman who must have been very tired) to re-pack her luggage and pay baggage fees seems like the worst part of this, and that part wasn't addressed by UA, since UA probably didn't really bother to read what OP wrote and instead copied and pasted something even larger than the Gettysburg Address to create some cheap and fake illusion of empathy.