I'm starting to plan a trip for my wife and I to Thailand in March and wanted to get some feedback of my proposed itinerary. This will be our first time in SE Asia.

We only have 10-12 days, and it will be during one of our few breaks from work, so I want to dedicate close to half of it to pure relaxation at a nice resort. The other half I'm very open to be jampacked and experience Thai culture. I understand we won't be able to see much in the timeframe we have, so I need guidance to focus on some highlights

My initial plan is:

Days 1-2 Chiang Mai (flights are not booked yet, plan to arrive midday)
- aclimate to Thai culture in a smaller city
- visit Elephant camp and possibly other outdoor-ish activities
Days 3-6 Bangkok (plan to fly)
- soak in all the markets etc.
- lots of other touristy activities TBD
Days 6-10 Ko Samui (plan to fly)
- relax on the beach at Le Meridien and maybe one or two activities
Day 11 - Plan to depart late night

Is there another city you would recommend visiting instead of Chiang Mai? I'm also open to other resort options besides Ko Samui, but my priority is a high end resort that is a good value using SPG or Marriott points. The Le Meridien seemed to be a sweet spot.

As far as activities and what we are looking for.. in theory I would love to be adventurous, go hiking in some remote villages, experience Thailand like a local, etc. but in reality every time I have bought my wife to a non-western country we have had bad experiences and she gets very uncomfortable, particularly with sanitation issues or when there are excessive/high-pressure hawkers. Ideally, we would like to do something maybe slightly adventurous but be able to retreat to a higher end/relaxing hotel at the end of the day and for some meals (if she was uncomfortable with the food sanitation of local restaurants).

I hope I didn't offend with the last paragraph, but being slightly OCD, it is just the reality of how we feel sometimes when experiencing other cultures in settings we are not accustomed to. Despite being uncomfortable, we want to get out there and experience as much as we can, while still enjoying ourselves.

Any suggestions for activities (keeping the above in mind) would also be appreciated!