The future game plan is simple: don't fly UL. I wonder what you would call a true disaster involving UL. You've already used up with hyperbole and exaggeration the most apt term.

Too friendly to Y passengers - they should be treated like low class citizens
Waking you to see if you'd like food service - absolutely unforgiveable
Smiling at you but taking 30 minutes to check you in - total incompetance

Have you actually been to a rundown bar in CMB? I highly doubt it.