Have good news. I contacted my son's 35-year-old cousin who lives in Los Angeles. (Niece of the uncle). She told the Uncle that the guide had an American boyfriend and explained how American children were raised differently than Chinese children. Everyone also assumed that I knew the boyfriend well. (I didn't) The Uncle was happy to then let my son go with the guide. My son has had 2 real good excursions with the guide. Luck and a lot of work on my side (many emails and many contacts to many people) solved the problem.

Both my son and the family will benefit greatly from the arrangement.