Just remember:

Treaty of Rome (freedom of movement in the EU)
and the
European Convention on Human Rights article 8 and 12 (I think)
are your friend.

The first allows free movement around and into the EU for EU citizens, the second gives those EU citizens the right to a family life and thus makes it illegal to discriminate against non-EU spouses. So it is discrimination to force them into another queue!

Of course, some of it only applies if you are "European", which you only become after exercising your treaty rights in another EU country other than the one of your passport for at least six months.