Originally Posted by
BAg Lady
^ So glad that somebody read the article. And gets it
Pianomit, I apologise if I started something unpleasant on this thread, and you got unfairly maligned. That was not my intention. Admitting to being an introvert feels like something to be ashamed of, something abnormal in a society that values extroversion. This thread stirred up some of the frustrations of the introverts on here, and you unfairly took the brunt of it.
I really would like you to understand where I am coming from. I do find people interesting and spend most of my working life talking to colleagues, suppliers and customers. I speak at conferences and am often interviewed by industry media. I lead a public life and to all intents and purposes, most people would think I am an extrovert. However, the only way I can recharge my batteries, and keep doing what I do, is if I have time for myself and can be left alone with my thoughts.
I will always smile at a neighbour and nod my head. However, as soon as I say hello it is usually taken as an invitation to chat. I have met some interesting people in this way, but I have also had my ear worn off by self-obsessed bores. I am too polite to cut them off so suffer on in silence.
In either case, whether I enjoyed the conversation or not, I will have delayed my "alone time" and will not have had the chance to recharge, which leaves my tired and unfocused. So I prefer not to give any indication that I am open to chat when flying. I need the downtime, and I imagine most introverts will feel the same.
I appreciate the apology. And I too am sorry if people took what I said too personally and were upset by it. That was definitely not the intention.
I understand exactly what you mean BAg Lady... The myth that extroverts are unable to understand introverts is just that - a myth. They might not agree and sympathise, but they can certainly understand the psychological logic behind introversion. As I have said previously, I happen to be an ambivert - so although people usually assume I'm a total extrovert (also because of my career choice) I actually have introvert tendencies as well.
It is because of this, that I would still like to offer you one bit of advice. 'Too polite... and suffer in silence' is a bit of an excuse. No one will think you are rude if you tell them that you are not interested in conversation in a diplomatic way. If you then find that they don't stop bothering you, you have every right to tell them to cork it, rather bluntly (if that's what it takes). But no one need ever suffer in silence, and use manners as the excuse for it.