Lots of valid replies in both directions in this thread and vastly more civil than usual on this website. All very much appreciated.
Originally Posted by
mspflyer3
NewYorkMoscowFlyer64 -
I understand your situation, your anger, your sentiments, all of it. I understand that the "busybody" probably just pissed you off more. But let me just say, it sounds like you were being kind of a dick.
Flying is a tense, stressful situation for most. Believe it or not, getting so upset with a flight attendant/situation that you "can't think straight" (your words, not mine) negatively affects the other people around you, and makes it more tense and stressful than before. That's probably why the "busybody" spoke up, and why I don't think she was a "busybody" at all. By getting pissed of, emanating the negative energy/anger that you did (as it seems just from reading your post), you were making everyone else in the cabin uncomfortable.
Sure, you lost your glasses. Sh*tty situation (not as sh*tty as AF-toilet-water-dude, though). But you know what? You found them, got apologies, and everything was fine.
If you go into a trip on a commercial airliner thinking that everything is going to go right for you, you're gonna have a bad time. And this expectation, in my belief, is why there are so many pissed off travelers out there. It's also why there are DYKWIAs.
So were you a DYKWIA? Wasn't there, can't decide. But I can tell you, that when encountering people like you in similar situations, it's a whole lot more comfortable for everyone around you if you just chill the f*ck out, deal with it later if you're really pissed, and don't make a scene. Like I said, it's unreasonable to expect everything to go perfectly.
And even when something really ridiculous and horrible happens far outside the realm of reasonable expectation, like having the flight attendants throw out your single pair of glasses (buy a second effing pair, jesus!), remember that you're still sitting in a chair in the god damned sky.
Your point above about my negative energy and anger making people around me feel uncomfortable is what the busybody said. She used close to exactly those words. The only thing I would respond is that if the Flight Attendants just left me alone after I got back to my seat, or accepted one response from me whatever the response was, things would have been a lot more chill. The exacerbation was caused by the repeated entreaties -- and I did not feel it was reasonable to pressure me to give a response. I admit I could not think straight. Those are my words and I stand by them. In my view it should be understandable that, when a person goes through a very unexpected pressing stressful situation imposed on him/her from outside, that person needs some time to gather his/her thoughts and relax before he or she can start making reasonable judgements. I said this to the busybody. I told her I needed time before I could think straight and I did not think it reasonable to pressure me to make a decision. She said my view was unreasonable, and I do not need to think, i just need to let go.
One thing that is clear to me from the responses here is what happened seems to be somewhere in the middle. There seems to be a fair amount of opinion going both ways (which was also true on the plane as I had two neighbors contradicting each other) and, although I was quite self-absorbed at the time, I could have helped the situation by saying something like "lets just leave the situation alone" or something like that which may well have politely short-circuited the continuing entreaties in a face saving for all manner. However, only hindsight is 20/20 and you do not have it in the heat of the moment.