Several years ago in one of the DEN Red Carpet Clubs I was eating 1/2 of a sandwich that my wife packed for me. The cleaning lady approaches, stands in front of me, puts both hands on her hips, and in a loud voice tells me, "I guess you never learned how to read English!!!" "There's a sign downstairs that says --- NO OUTSIDE FOOD"!

Learnt me real good, she did!