If you miss a day of vacation because a flight is late, you should get 5% off.

If you miss a meeting, you should get 10% off.

If you miss an important meeting, you should get 15% off.

If you miss a job interview, you should get 20% off.

If you miss a wedding, you should get 25% off.

If you miss your own wedding, you should get 30% off.

If you miss a funeral, you should get 35% off.

If you miss your own funeral, you should get free upgrades for life.

It is really the least a caring airline could do.