COMING BACK

Sangster International Airport (MBJ)
http://www.mbjairport.com/

Departures
Our Butler gave us access to a PC to [sadly] OLCI and PYOBP for the return journey at around T-24. Although check-out the next day was at 1100, we were lucky that our room wasn't needed immediately so we were able to remain in "resort casual" for most of the day until changing into "BA CW Casual" for the flight home. As with our arrival, everything was organised to the last detail and at exactly 1430 the mini-bus pulled up to take just us and our 2 cases to MBJ for the flight home.

The Departures Hall is VERY wide, and the BA desks are at the far right-hand end. The very last 2 desks are for CW passengers. Oh well, a bit of exercise won't kill us! There were a couple of pax in front of us: I suspect they get a bit of bunching as the various resort buses drop off their passengers. Everything was normal, friendly and efficient and our bags were tagged through to JER. We were then issued with our Club Mobay Admission Voucher.

This is where it gets interesting. With your Admission Voucher in your hand, you reverse course towards the Departures zone for Immigration and Security. On the left end, guarded by a Tensa-barrier, is the "VIP" bit. Lo! and Behold! … the barrier is unlatched, and you get your escort [yes, a real human being with a smile] who escorts you personally to an Immigration desk! The guy said it was a bit quiet, but I gathered the impression that you get put to the front of any line! So … Immigration [surely Emigration?] took a couple of minutes: and there was no mention of the Departure Tax we were reminded about at the hotel. Then on to Security: as that was quiet, there was no delay, but I guess again that the Mobay voucher and the escort would have steered us to the front of any queue. After all, they charge $35 for the ticket for non-Premium pax. Security was fairly standard … shoes, belts, all the usual stuff. I was a bit surprised, when collecting my gear from the belt to be asked "Do you have a lighter in that bag?" I replied in the affirmative, extracted a disposable from the top pocket of my back-pack … at which point it was confiscated. Eeeeeekkk. The odd aspect is that I actually had 2 in my back-pack, and my wife had one in her handbag: apparently handing over one of mine satisfied the daily quota?

Anyway, head for the right-hand corner, up the escalator, and you're in the typical airport shopping Mall … with a Caribbean twist!



I'm not a great fan of airport shopping, but MBJ has managed to make the lonnnnggg corridor of shops very attractive. Whatever … we looked at Duty Free cigarettes, decided they weren't great value and moved on. BIG error, as prices at LGW have just soared … we could have paid around £38 at MBJ for what was £50+ at LGW.

So, we head for Gate 9, keeping to the left side of the Concourse, for the "Club Mobay".



http://www.clubmobay.com/index.php
http://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractio...y_Jamaica.html

The Lounge was "OK", although the food offering was about as minimal as you can get. Cheese or Ham sandwiches and a few cakes and some interesting Jamaican crisps [oh, it's BA's "Afternoon Tea"!]. A served Bar, and some self-service juice dispensers on the left … which included a really nice Rum Punch. I went for the cultural thing! And then we headed, as we do, for somewhere to smoke. Yes, I know, we're dirty people - I suspect some of you have bad habits as well! Anywaaaay …. the Vibe Lounge is a Bar, where customers are allowed to smoke. Clever marketing, that one! So a nice Rum Punch was $8, and we managed a couple of ciggies before heading to the Gate - braced for the next 10 hours.



And so to Gate 15, which [so my BP says] closes at 1745. At 1730 we were treated to the arrival of 2 FD crew and 2 CC … the rest drifted in over the next 10 minutes. At 1755, after the boarding of 5 wheelchairs, the lady on the desk called for "Club, Gold and Silver". At this point, the lemmings started to surge forward. I give that short lady great credit … she beat the idiots back, and kept calling for the priority pax who were supposed to board first!! We got through eventually, with a bit of tactical battering with our carry-ons!!




19 Jan 12
BA2284, 1830 MBJ-LGW 0815
G-VIIB
Somewhere along the way, BA decided to use a 4-class 777 for the return flight: this scuppered our seating plans! The FIRST cabin was blocked out, so at OLCI we had settled for the 'domesticated pair' at 15E/F.

This aircraft is packed … we settled in to 15E/F, and a young couple settled in to 15D and 15G. Oh, how sad. Anyway, as the hordes climbed aboard [all through Door 1L, through the Old First cabin] there was a bit of fluttering between some pax and the CC. Eventually it transpired that one of the occupants of 15D/G was consigned to a Jump-seat, as "there's a passenger with higher status". Hello? What? Evicted from a CW seat to a jump-seat? The true British gentleman in his 20's told his girlfriend that his back couldn't cope with that, so off she went to oblivion … and another 20-something occupied the other CW seat. (Why do 20-somethings never shave properly? Stubble is so NOT cool). And … who were those people in FIRST? You know, the blocked off cabin that seemed to be occupied by assorted Caribbean people with beards? Was this a "secret First"? Curious, for sure.

We got airborne - that's something BA does really rather well, albeit 15 minutes late. The usual round of hot towels and drinkies ensued - I asked the CC if the Chablis was cool, she offered me a taste to check … it was cool! Come top-up time, she told me she'd put it on ice to make sure! I don't know your name, cute little blonde lady, but thank you!!

And so to "The Meal". I'm not going to list everything, because it's boring, but the choice was fairly dire.
Grilled Fillet of Beef, etc etc.
Fettucine with creamy mushroom sauce.
Jamaican Style jambalaya (V).
Chilled main course salad of Thai-style shrimp.

Is this the food that made Britain Great? Apart from the beef, you have a choice of foreign stuff? Only one thing to chew on? We are both omnivores, but chose the Veggie jumbalaya, which would have benefitted from some shrimp, andouille sausage and that sort of thing … but at least it was a better option than a dead piece of cow, and it was actually quite tasty. SWMBO had the Coconut Cream Pie, which was OK … I had the Selection of cheese which was just about OK. And that was it … no "Tea or Coffee". I gave up, and as the looped IFE offering was also utterly crepe, went to sleep. SWMBO did the same. It was a very turbulent flight, and the Captain did say he was trying to get out of it [unsuccessfully] but we were tired and didn't care anyway!

Oh, good-oh, BA's breakfast. I really couldn't be bothered to wake up for it, but SWMBO did. Yup, the bread was stale as usual, and the "fruit selection" was full of melon that she can't stand the smell of. However, she reports a really good bacon roll on a ciabatta-type bun with loads of good bacon. Whatever, I'll wait to have breakfast at Gatters. Oh, and guess what … no "Tea of Coffee" with breakfast either. No announcement, no nothing. Neither of us drink tea, and the BA coffee is execrable, but … nothing. I shall complain, of course!

However, the male CM [apparently of Italian extraction?] was great. Thanks, G*******. However, the CC who called my wife "my darling" wasn't exactly portraying CW customer service - it seemed rather patronising to a woman who's over 60. Good try, but wrong.

GATTERS
Immigration at LGW was painless, where 6 e-passport booths were functioning well. Why does LGW have 6, when LHR has only 2? How hard does it have to be to get into your own country? Anyway, having learned our lesson on the outbound, we 'entered the UK' to have a freezing cold ciggie at the curb-side squalor booth, and reminded ourselves how much we hate "catch-all legislation", before returning via the excellent and empty "Premium Gatwick" security entrance and thence to the shopping Mall [ooops, airport]. The Terraces was fairly full, but we eventually found comfy chairs for the 3-hour loiter before the last leg of the journey.

20 Jan 12
BA2772, 1150 LGW-JER 1250
G-whatever
I'm tired and I want to go home. I've been up for about a day, and travelling for more hours than I'm usually out of bed. I really don't care what the aircraft's registration is, and I don't even care what type it is. It's BA metal, it's safe and efficient, and I don't want to marry it! (I think it was a 734, because I did read the safety card). It flew us home, with a fast lunch of a poached salmon salad thing, and it only took about 35 minutes. That will do! Taxi to home [15 minutes], quick ciggie [5 minutes], off to the JSPCA to rescue one pi55ed off cat [20 minutes], and … dammit, we're home again. And the weather is dismal.

Still, we had a wonderful escape from the gloom of winter at a wonderful hotel, and it's only just over 3 months before the next holiday [aka "Shop Virginia v.14.0"]. And all our BAEC TPs and Avios posted correctly within 48 hours, so we're both Silver/Emerald for another year and with a healthy 6-digit Avios balance in the Household Account