Do you have the audacity to buy a bag LARGER than the maximum legal carry-on size, because you think your trip is somehow more important than the other 200 people on your plane? Do you want to waste all of their time while a Flight Attendant fights to get the door closed, before they finally shame you out in public and make you check the bag?

If so, I hope you feel two things... a) shame. And b) a very sore arm, because I believe new international airline policy should be that all of your fellow passengers get one free punch.