I've been to quite a few do's and other FF events and everyone has always been considerate during meal time. I'd say if uk1 doesn't like buffets, not to participate.

I love dim sum buffets in Asia. I had one in Jakarta last month. $7 for great shrimp, scallops and cuttlefish items, plus roasted duck and a lot of other good stuff.

Many generic US buffets are garbage. Home Town buffet is hideous. I used to go to Furr's cafeteria, but they closed most of them down. The Wynn in Vegas is quite nice. Also had an excellent one in New Orleans, one of big hotels, for Sunday brunch, and I still remember the food 15 years later.