Tips 1 - 6:

1. Allocate no more than 10 minutes to enjoying the reading library, near the museum. In the non-Schengen area, into whose piers E or F you will probably be decanted.

2. Decide beforehand if you want to use an eReader or real paper-print books; this will maximise your pleasure.

3. Take in the short tour of the adjoining museum. When your cultural needs have been, in part, thus sated, move on.

4. Stroll towards the premium fast-track entry into Schengen area, or if you want to win time for a second coffee later, calmly join the 'short connection' line.

4A. Remember that while many Dutch residents and nationals are genetically incapable of queueing in transportation facilities, this is not a sign of rudeness. As a crowded and consensual society, we know that others may be richer in genetic programming and poorer in politeness. So, if you want to be a poor ambassador, just shove. We shall shrug.

5. Now take the stairs nearby to enjoy the (Schengen side) KLM Crown lounge. Upon entry, go immediately to the service desks on yonder side of the entrance, and announce your wish for a luxurious shower (rain-style). Leave your BP with the person who hands you a key with a smile. Ask the friendly attendant for an extra towel, to optimise your drying.

6. Enjoy at least one coffee or other beverage in the lounge before continuing to the gate, by calmly footing it. Boarding will have started 30 minutes before departure, and as long as you are visibly approaching the gate, politely and perspiration-free, at least 11 minutes before the announced departure time, you will be considered as a welcome and a well-organised guest.

Enjoy your stay

- Paul