The Upgrade Streak ENds at ONE

I stayed up writing and calling friends till 12:01 when I called CO's elite line to see if I could get upgraded on my CLE-EWR return that sunday.

here's the story: if I didn't get the upgrade, I was goign to try to get on an earlier flight. My catsitter, Agnes had to go see her sister so the cats would have to wait hours for din din. No upgarde, I would go standby for an earlier flight.

The first CO rep I get is Miss Anderson (whose voice sounds like Eartha Kitt.) I ask for my upgrade and she PURRS "Mr. Blanchard, I tried three times to get you upgraded but the whole first class on that flight is sold out. I could not even sell you a first class ticket if you wanted one."

So I ask if she could get me on an earlier flight, upgrade or not. She says I have to go to the airport and wait.

I called two other reps: A nice lady (who sounded twelve) and A Texan dude (who sounded like JAWS sounds "I'm so sorry buddy that I can't get you a first class seat! It's asham because you are an elite. There are several Platniums and paid on that flight."

So I said I can survive coach for one hour and went to sleep.

The Trip to Coach!

If you go to CLE and want to save a few $$ and are staying downtown, do try the Subway... It's quick and convenient and clean. I took it to Hopkins and after a short walk reached checkin.

Went on the elite line. This woman in front of me was wondering why the "regular people" were being called to the desk before us. She charged up and demaned to be taken next. I waited and Jennifer (who looked 12 but was a genius and friendly.) saw I was NOT upgraded on the 5:35p flight. She said "do you want to try for an earlier flight. I can't give you first but why wait at the airport for five hours."

She read my mind. I took her up on the offer. She said to go to the desk and wait for my name to be called. She said "as a CO silver elite your chances are excellent. You are even #1 on standby."

I guess CO being silver is not that bad.

SO after chicken wings and the biggest MUG of Sams I ever had at the CHEERS pub I felt good and ready to survive coach.

Went to the desk adn was told by this older agent I had to wait until 10 minutes before departure.

So I wait 25 minutes. Then I'm the first to be called, I grab the boarding pass... 25F (YUK! Window in the back of the plane) but feel better I'll be home early to hug the kitties!

Spare me the Air Sick stories from teh Peanut gallery

AMong the passengers were a tour group of Junior High School students and chapperones heading to Israel (they were mostly well behaved) and this father and mother with four kids (I called them the Peanut gallery) who kept telling about getting sick on the plane and how one kid could (word for getting sick) at the drop of the hat. I heard these kids and their father tell air sick stories and silly jokes for 20 minutes. I growled.

I was seated next to this old man who seemed annoyed he was separated from his wife and seated next to me. So he spread out his arms and I get his elbow in my side.

The head F-A joked during safety announcements "please put your air mask on before helping children and adults who act like kids." the peanut gallery howled and said "dad, you are a kid."

Well the kid who alwasy got sick did, twice and our whole section had to hear the story. Over and over. I luckily had ear plugs and put them in my ears.

The flight was quick. there was a drink service and I used one of the coupons Old Gold and Canadian Flyer gave me (thanks Brothers!) for a Sam Adams. The F-A (who had a funny button on with the word "Whining" in a circle with a slash thru it) apologized for it not being cold. I told her "it's Sams adams, I'll pretend it's cold." And I Motioned to the Peanut gallery.

It's not like I don't like children. Just these kids were a bit too description on teh jokes. (So spare me the attacks like the last time I talked about children!)

The flight got in about 15 minutes early. After a delay first for a late deparitng plane at our gate, then the Peanut gallery taking forever to get their stuff together, I headed home.

Mr Sour Driver behind the Wheel

Had the most sour taxi driver, who complained when I told him to take the Pulaski Skyway instead of the Turnpike. (He claimed the skyway was wall to wall traffic and we would sit there.) I told him if we took the turnpike we'll be on the other side of town and I didn't want to spend 30 more minutes driving around J-C.

We drove by the Skyway, he decides to take the 1&9 Truck route. There was ZERO Traffic. I sarcastically remarked "look at all that traffic on the skyway." He muttered something and with that lost what little tip I would give him.

He muttered the whole trip. He took local streets. I had to direct him to my home. I gave him no tip and he slammed the hood.

SOrry folks, but I think I know best the fastest way to get to my home.

SO overall: terrific service from CO, a purrfect weekend in Cleveland.. other than the air sick kids and the sour cabbie.

THE END! SO you boys can go back to sleep now!