About 6 years ago, I flew to Chicago for the weekend to hang out with some good friends I rarely see as we live all over the country. Come sunday morning, we all shared a van to the airport together as our flights were within several hours of one another. Upon check in, we were offered a paid first class upgrades at the kiosk. My buddy went for it for his flight, I declined. After a few departures, I was left alone with one friend. Im not certain what time it was but the bars had just opened. In the same clothes from the previous night and nursing a horrible hangover as we had only slept an hour or so, we began to drink heavily with about 90 minutes to go before my flight. Suddenly I looked at my watch and noticed my departure time had just passed. I jumped up and ran as fast as possible to the gate falling all over myself. When I arrived, they addressed me by name and claimed they had been paging me for some time.
I was speaking so fast and drunk they couldnt understand me but they let me onto the walkway and said hurry up. I hustled down the peaceful empty walkway only to step onto a packed aircraft. Every other pax seemed to be staring at me with anger as if I had been holding them up. I was drunk, sweaty and felt absolutely gross. At that moment, I looked down at my ticket and saw I had a middle seat in the middle of the plane. I look out and saw my seat, a middle between two rather large men. ::Panic set in:: I did a quick about face and bump into the flight attendant. I quickly say "Who do I pay the money too for the upgrade" She could not understand my jibrish as she made me repeat it several times. She then said that I could not upgrade after boarding. I gave her a look that begged for mercy and she said "just sit right by that window, we have to get moving." 10 seconds later I was passed out cold in first class on my way home to New York. That woman was my angel!
Lesson one: Always secure an upgrade (especially if you have a middle!)
Lesson two: Never get too wasted at the airport bar
I still cannot believe I almost missed that flight even tho I arrived almost 5 hours early!