Hi Dave,
My fiance and I were on the same flight (seats 4AB) with you. We actually were booked on AF by AA, because our flight the previous day to LHR had been canceled and thus were rerouted through CDG. (With the chaos that was LHR, I thought CDG would be better because if worse came to worse, we could always return to AMS with the Thalys).
I remember the pilot mentioning that the crew would time out, if we wouldn't take off within a certain time. I kept a close watch in my watch and saw that we took off approximately 15 minutes before the timeout, which in that case is legal. As long as the plane takes off before the crew goes illegal, then its legal.
As for the diversion to MXP, it was done because AA does have ground handling crew there. They could have diverted to AMS (a lot nicer for me), where they do have landing rights, but don't have a handling crew.
We were lucky enough that we were booked over to the last KLM flight of the night to AMS, so we reached AMS exactly 24 hours after the AA flight departed from DFW. We are also without luggage, and can only conclude that your luggage as well as ours is part of the 50,000 pieces sitting at CDG currently being sorted.
As far as liability goes, AA carried all of us to the destination we were supposed to go to, so they fulfilled their contractual obligation.
I understand your frustration with the situation, and it makes it even worse when we are powerless to do anything about the situation (luggage). My fiance and I are supposed to get married in 8 days, and her wedding dress is in one of suitcases that is stuck in CDG as we speak. Talk about nerve racking!
My advice is hang tight, its going to work, but its going to take a while until it does.