Appreciate the comments jiejie. I wasn't looking for 'fake american niceness', being a Brit and all that. And not speaking mandarin, it might well have been reticence -- I experienced that a lot on my trip to BJ. However, my gut is that my experience at Da Dong went over and above that reticence.

I still left having enjoyed my meal, and some aspects of the overall service were excellent. I think as with most chinese food, a group setting is always optimal, and one can then concentrate on the food -- the main goal -- rather than have time to be distracted by other matters.

tb

PS And good to know that my jacket issue wasn't a faux pas