UA 395 ORD SAN 1800 2020 752 4B Ch9^^ Empower
actually took off about 1930, landed in the mid-9 pms.
was UA 651 ORD SAN 2019 2231 752 5D

The flight was an hour and change late. The agent at the RCC
did a doubletake at her screen before saying, uh, I guess
the crew was delayed. I wonder what the real story was.

My seatmate asked me if I wanted a window seat (usually, the
answer is yes, but today I felt Mr. Lasix calling rather
urgently). She said, then I won't have to bother you getting
up and going to the restroom all the time. I told her that
it was all the same, either I bothered her or she bothered
me. She actually stayed put at the window (and got up only
twice during the flight) and turned out to be a perfectly
okay seatmate.

I guess they got to try out the new phraseology today -
instead of "position and hold," the controllers henceforth
are to say "line up and wait," which saves one syllable but
sounds kind of stupid. Every time ground control said "line
up and wait," the pilots would chuckle.

GC: American xxx, line up ... and ... waaaait.
American: Line up ... and ... waaaait, American xxx.
UA 395: How long have you been doing this?
GC: About an hour.
UA 395: Well done.
American: Gotta do it in an accent no one can understand,
though.
[a few more line-up-and-waits later]
GC: Have to get my practice in - been doing it one way for
22 years, and now they tell me to change.

The flight itself was fine, the crew quite jolly.

Catering sort of lacked. The choices were chicken or lasagne
- but nobody knew whether the lasagne had red meat in them,
about which some of the Califunny people made urgent and
loud inquiries. I was concerned about cheese, as cheese
greps me, especially in the air, so I said I'd prefer the
chicken. The purser said that there should be no problem
getting my first choice. I should have chosen the no food
option, though as it turns out the pasta smelled kind of
good. The chicken was a dried-out slice of breast with fake
grill marks (they were sort of crooked and unparallel),
heavily brined, in a sauce that appeared to be cornstarch
water seasoned with salt, salt, salt, sage, and salt. On
the side, cheese polenta (so much for avoiding dairy), which
tasted okay but was kind of salty, carrots (salty), and
asparagus cooked to the texture of pudding (salty) mixed
with miraculously not too salty and not overcooked edamame.
The salad was half cucumber (skin left on) and half romaine,
with lite ranch dressing on the side. I left most of my food
but was grateful for the chocolate chip cookie that came
later. Courvoisier flowed freely throughout.

I fell asleep to the dulcet tones of ATC and woke flailing
about for some reason, doing something I haven't done before
in 55 years of flying - knocked over my (thankfully almost
empty) Cognac and broken the glass. And it was a water glass
and not one of those new stemware, so I must have thumped
it pretty hard.

We landed something over an hour late.

They had a supposedly upgraded room for me at the Hilton,
which doesn't have free wi-fi, or, in fact, any wi-fi at
all, except in the lobby (where it is free, using the promo
code LOBBY). The room had a water view, though lili,
whom I am to meet today for leg one of the VIE Do, tells
me all the rooms have a water view.

The wired Internet wasn't working, either, and anyhow the
manager asserts that they charge even golds and diamonds
for it (perhaps the memo hasn't come through).

Speaking of water, the tap stuff is brackish and moldy, so
I had to use one of the bottled waters. There are two big
Glaceau Smart Waters in full view, $5 each; down underneath
there are two little Hilton waters, free (I hope).

The bed was very comfy, though, and I got six joyous hours'
sleep.