I think the issue with this particular situation is that there are so many other things going on, and everyone's tastes/preference/plans are a little different.

With the other DOs, I typically am going to another city just to do whatever is being offered by the organizer. Maybe there will be a visit with a friend to squeeze in during the trip, but nothing like all the parties and events for FSF.

Believe me, I have plenty of str8 friends who never seem to commit to more than a maybe, no matter how much advance notice I give them of a dinner or party.