You'll have to change your name to 'Prince Charles', Merry. Or, better yet - 'Robert Mugabe', 'Laurent Kabila', or any of a dozen others. Perhaps you could buy a small country & set yourself up as president.

There are endless problems in small 'democratic' countries when self-important politicians commandeer the national airlines' planes (without any notice at all) to take them where they want to go. Lots of angry stranded tourists...

The other good thing about commandeering a plane is that you and your retinue generally skip customs entirely, so you can carry as much contraband as you wish - none of that Spice's problem when she failed to declare the ring for her footballer (remember that?) And if you decide that you want to stop off somewhere en route - no problem: your wish is the pilot's command.

When you land they'd roll the red (or blue for you, Merry) carpet right out to the plane for you. And minions would carry you so that your feet wouldn't even have to touch the ground. And there would be dancing, ululating women wearing clothing made of material with your face all over it. Everyone else at the airport would be delayed for at least six hours while a massive motorcade with inept motorcycle cops carries you away, sirens wailing as everyone else in the vicinity has to stop & look respectful.

Sounds better & better. Hmm, where did I put my 'tinpot banana republics for sale' brochure?