I nearly forgot about this one:
On last weeks flight the guy sitting next to me (SEN on F award) asked the FA for TOMORROWs newspaper - not today's, as he had already read that one !
The silly excuse that tomorrows paper had not been printed yet was not accepted by this chap and he shook his head and mumbled something.
I subsequently asked the FA for next week's lottery numbers. However they turned out to be wrong too. A disgrace !