This is something of a vent, but I prefer to package it as a suggestion.

Please, if you are travelling with a group and family and would like to change seats with another passenger, do not just take his seat when he has not boarded yet.

Twice I have encountered a family camping out together in a group of seats, one of them not theirs, to create a fait accompli and talk the seatholder out of his plans. It is best to wait until the holder of that seat shows up, then negotiate. This is because: a) It allows the seatholder to get settled in, and not to see an immediate quandary confronting him when about to take a flight: travel is stressful, even when for fun; and b) it allows the seatholder to be magnanimous and gracious in yielding the original seat/changing seats, rather than being put on the spot and grudgingly moving (more or less coerced).

It stinks if the seatholder is travelling solo; the appearance is that if he wants his seat he's being a cold-hearted jerk not accommodating to Mommy, Daddy, the Children, and the Extended Family.

It happened to me once before, and I let it go, but the second time it happened recently, I dug my heels in. I held a nice aisle bulkhead seat, and having just endured a sleepless night (not talking about being in bed and not sleping, but not even climbing into bed), I really needed to get some solid rest, and being able to elevate my feet on that wall was a must. The family who had squatted my seat was offering a seat across the aisle, but the askew set-up of the plane only gave me a partial wall there. I also offered to trade for the window seat, but they wanted that one.

So, as someone engaged and looking forward to travelling with babies and family someday I can empathize, but that is also not to say that because a traveller is going solo, he is completely footloose and fancy-free.

Given that the first time I gave in and that the second I held my ground (the stakes were higher as it was a trans-atlantic flight), at least the personal scales of justice are aright for now and may not be so stbborn next time, but I hope people just become more considerate in the future instead.

Please commiserate or flame as desired!