Well, I completely sympathize with your situation and I myself have been harried before in trying to bring together both air and hotel at the same time, and I know you aren't going to want to hear this right now but...

I think you made a mistake here too. There is no way in the world I would book a non-refundable hotel reservation without personally setting my eyes upon that flight itinerary to verify it's correctness, particularly when doing this over the phone, rather than on AA.com, which just begs for a data entry mistake like this.

With the PNR, you could have immediately logged into AA.com and checked the itinerary before booking the hotel. This would have taking two minutes at the most. In fact, generally, if I'm doing a phone booking with AA, I'm actually logged into AA.com and keep hitting refresh until I see the itinerary and then I verify it before we hang up.

So, I guess what I'm saying is that it's not just AA's fault here, but it seems to me that it's kinda yours too, unfortunately... (and I say that having learned my own hard travel lessons on occasion too)

Good luck either way and I certainly hope you can work something out.

Regards