I had a hard time getting the breakfast at the Millenium Hilton in NY. It wasn't that they didn't believe they should give it to me, they just never got around to doing it.
I checked in, having reserved two rooms (on separate folios, unfortunately) as a gold member. I asked about an executive lounge, and they said they didn't have one. So I asked about breakfast coupons. Since my rooms weren't ready anyway they made a request on the folder.
When I came back, still no breakfast coupons. They were happy to give them to me when I asked a second time, but I did have to ask -- not once, but twice. Breakfast is normally $16 (for continental!) so this was a good deal.
As far as upgraded rooms, we didn't get any. I'd reserved one room as a junior suite anyway, and the second wasn't upgraded, though I didn't ask explicitly. The junior suite room got two small pieces of chocolate and a bottle of sparkling (yuck) water. I'm not sure if that was because it was a suite, or because of gold VIP. The other gold VIP got nothing (other than an erroneous mini-bar tab, but they took care of that easily).
As another interesting note, I'd booked a rate that I had to prepay. One of my bills had a balance of $0.01 on it. I took it downstairs and gave them penny, and that took care of it.