Hello
megshaye and welcome to FT!
As mentioned by a couple other posters attending a 'DO' is helpful. Not sure where you are or which air line you care to frequent but there are a few 'DOs' planned over the next few months. There is the Ann Arbor Art Fair DO 5 (DTW)- July 18-19, 2009 and then the Greasy Spoon Do - ATL, May 16th. The Ann Arbor DO would probably be what you are looking for. The ATL DO may be more of a friendly get together although I am sure anyone would be happy to answer a question.
Monitoring the forum of your favorite air line and or hotel then asking the posters questions about how they found a specific Mileage Run (MR) or hotel special is another way to learn the ins and outs.
Travel safe and have fun