Royal First Lounge BKK

When we landed in BKK, the windows fogged over extensively, so it was impossible to see outside. We pulled up to the C concourse and the jetways were locked in place. Rosalin and her colleagues blocked off the unwashed, disheveled, poor passengers from Royal Silk Class so we could exit from Royal First. Of course, with the traditional “wai” greeting and echoes of “korp khun krap” from the Thai staff. Upon exiting the aircraft, I spotted no less than 6 government officials waiting for Mr. Atta Mills, and at the end of the jetway was a young man in purple silk coat with the cart and my name on the board. I waited for my companion and politely asked to the driver if he could join us on the buggy ride to the Royal First Lounge. He said it was not a problem and we hopped on and drove a whopping 60 seconds to the escalator that goes up to the lounge. :-) I was really hoping for some Formula 1 buggy driving through BKK. But instead, our plane had parked so close to the lounge location, we got 60 seconds of mediocre speed and alot of horn beeping. We did almost run over a Japanese man though. It did provide for a small amount of excitement. Our connection to Denpasar was due to leave at 840am, so we had basically about 2 hours before we had to catch the buggy over to concourse E. We were warmly welcomed into the Royal First Lounge again with the sing-song “Sawadee kaaaaaaaaaaa” and “Sawadee kaaaaaap” and “wai” greetings. We were quickly escorted into one of the private rooms and asked if we wanted something to drink. We were both a bit dehydrated and it was 610am, much too early for a cocktail (even if I do believe in the old adage “No Liquor Before Noon”.. hell, it’s gotta be noon somewhere, right?). Our sparkling water was quickly brought in and they asked if we wanted spa treatments.

My companion was eager for another shower and I was happy for a massage. We were escorted into the Thai Spa and given cold, lemongrass scented towels (how wonderfully refreshing!!!) and some sort of brewed tea that was really unsual and not to my liking. It was blue. Cobalt blue. And had a slightly fermented flavour to it. Needless to say, I didn’t touch it after I’d tasted it. My companion was entitled to a complimentary 30 minute head and neck massage or foot massage. He elected for the head and neck massage and was taken to the right of the reception area. I was whisked away to the left into a private massage suite where I was greeted by my masseuse. The massage suite consisted of 3 main areas: bathtub/Jacuzzi room, massage room, and shower/toilet/changing area. These three areas can be closed off by sliding wooden-slatted doors. She showed me the closet in this third area that contained some slippers and a robe and told me to put my clothes in there. Then she handed me a pair of “disposable” underwear. I opened the plastic packaging to reveal what appeared to be a pair of nylon, see-through panties made for what I can only assume was a very petite woman or child. I asked if there was anything bigger. She giggled and handed me the XL nylon see-through underpants and I reluctantly took them. Isn’t that just a bit emasculating? Nylon see-through panties.. really? Anyway, she motioned for me to sit down on the ottoman in the changing area and proceeded to kneel in front of me, untie my shoelaces, remove my shoes and my socks and then stood up and started the shower. She gracefully backed out of the changing area and said she would be waiting in the other room for me when I was finished with my shower. I took a quick 5 minute shower (wishing I could’ve spent more time in the shower, actually), put on the emasculating Nylon see-through panties and the robe and slippers. I opened the door to find she was behind the entrance wall so as to give me as much privacy as I wanted. She held up the towel and asked me to please take off the robe and lay face down. I did that. She put the towel over me, climbed up on top of the table, rolled the towel down to my waistline before she noticed the emasculating Nylon see-through panties were just not working for me. She then proceeded to roll them down and slide them down my legs and take them off. Quite masterfully, I might add, as she did it without exposing one gram of “private area”. She started the massage and I must say it was a wonderful one hour. I think at one point I dozed off and was probably snoring. When it was finished, I took another shower, this time spending more time under the water, and changed into my travel clothes. I noticed that it was now 8am and boarding was to start in 10 minutes! I gathered my things and headed out of the massage suite. I handed the masseuse a €20 bill which she looked very surprised to receive. I almost want to say she was reluctant and shocked. Nonetheless, I had a pocket full of euros and €10 seemed like too little with €50 being way too much. I found my companion in the private room half-sleeping and we collected our belongings. I was a bit disappointed we didn’t have a longer layover so as to enjoy the food and other amenities in the Royal First Lounge. It was really quite empty when we arrived and the staff just seemed so incredibly eager to keep busy by serving us. I knew our return had a 5 hour connection, so I reassured myself that we would have more time to enjoy the lounge in a week’s time.

We asked if there was a buggy to take us to the connecting flight. They radioed and found not a single buggy was available. Ugggggghhhhhh. We had to walk/run from literally one side of the airport to concourse E, the very last gate at that! I arrived soaked in sweat and way out of breath only to find they hadn’t even started boarding yet and it was only 20 minutes before departure! Grrrrrrrrr… We waited around for just a few moments before they opened the doors and started boarding Royal Silk Class passengers.

(On a side note, in reference to an earlier post and thread about Royal First Lounge access, the lounge manager was there that day and I decided to ask her a few questions. I knew that there had been some discrepancies about access based on other FT member experiences. While I didn’t see any non-TG passengers in the lounge. In fact, there were only 2 other TG passengers in the lounge that morning, on the return I did see several non-TG passengers, mainly LX and LH, on the return portion. However, none of the private rooms were filled by these people, only TG passengers. Perhaps this was what she was referring to in my previous questions to her. You can find the thread here: http://www.flyertalk.com/forum/thai-...ccess-bkk.html )