In the late 90s, when the FAA required skycaps and ticket agents to ask pointless "security questions," I had an odd run-in with power-tripping Delta agent in Providence.

It was before 6:00 am, and she asked "Are your bags known to you?"
I believe I responded with, "WHAT?"
"I try to vary the questions," she said, "to make sure that people are listening."

I wanted to respond with, "Well I get along with the carry-on, but the suitcase and I are still getting to know each other."

I'm sure she had some gems for other passengers, "When did you not last unpack your unknown bags?"