I get why the hotel information is kept on a need-to-know basis, and agree with it. I also know and support the policy of FA's (and other US employees) not giving out their last names to pax. But, I though they were supposed to be able to provide you with some sort of an employee number, so you can positively identify them?
As "business 101" being polite to the customers, and as much as I hate to say it, I think the airlines are a lost cause. We'll always have poor-to-fair customer service, except on certain delighful occasions.