OP - I remain confused why, if you wanted to "protect" you wife, you simply did not pay the minimal fee and check the bags, so you could use both hands to shield her as you walked down to the plane. Surely the small chance that the bags would be delayed were not worth this stress.

If you weren't allowed to preboard, another thought is why didn't you let your wife rest in one of the chairs by the gate, and bring both bags on during your boarding group. Then you would have come back out and escorted your wife down and onto the plane, after everyone else was done boarding. Crowds would be gone and she could have boarded quietly.

Why doesn't anyone ever mention "post boarding"?