I was laughing out loud at your responses.
I even tried to forward them to my little sister-in-law (college) thinking that she is more in touch with the music scene and i could be "cool" to give her the free music.
I basically got a response that said "eMusic? ... ... is that all classic rock tunes or something your generation uses. That site sucks. Keep your coupons."
I actually forwarded it to AVIS and told them that while i appreciate 5 eMusic tracks a week ... 1-2 iTunes tracks would blow away in usability.
... no response.
In any case, i did get a kick out of how consistently worthless they are.