Wow, no negativity here at all. I think you all need to take a step back and realize that for every pet peeve you have, there are people in the dining room who either reinforce this or have the opposite pet peeve. I'm amazed that so many of you would go out for a good time yet be so absolutely negative about things. To me, I go to a restaurant to have fun, but for many of you it seems like you leave your house to find something to complain about. The travel forum is laced with whiny pet peeve threads where people complain about nothing. This seems the same.

You guys? How in the hell is that offensive? Seriously. Guys is a way to reference the entire table. What should the waiter say? How are you people? How are you all doing tonight? Were they to do this, they'd have other people .....ing about being addressed differently. They're addressing a group and using a perfectly valid way to do it. Pull that baguette out of your backside and relax.

"Waitstaff who swoop in to try to take my plate when I am NOT done. I will line my silverware on the side of the plate when I am done, thank you."

You know, they're not psychic. Do you correct people at your table and other tables when they don't place their silverware together on the side? The waiters have to ask because of OTHER DINERS not because of you or their ignorance. Plenty of people don't follow the rules. It'd be nice if they all did. In the case where a waiter waited until everyone had placed their cutlery correctly, the maitre d' (or manager given that most people here are probably complaining about chains) would be fielding complaints about slow service.

"OK, you can't always predict volumes 100% accurately, but please let me know up front."

FYI, no restaurant on the planet can do this. Perhaps you should look around and find the people who didn't make reservations and complain to them. In nice restaurants in particular where there are special preparations for different dishes this can happen.

"1. Don't ever interrupt a conversation at the table except to tell me there's a fire in the kitchen and the exit is to my left."

So they should wait for your ongoing discourse to end before they, say, get your drinks, tell you the dinner specials, take your order or serve your food. Given that this happens so much that you complain about it, I'm guessing that you'd be depriving your fellow guests timely service and you'd then be complaining about it again. Perhaps learning to hush up when someone is trying to help you might make your dinner go better.

"2. Always know what beers are available on tap, what beers are available in bottles and what today's specials are. Be clear and specific if asked to describe a dish."

It sounds like hooters might be more your speed. It barely qualifies as a pet peeve though. Some restaurants commonly have 30+ beer in a bottle. I really don't think I'd want to have dinner with someone that anal to have them all recited. Lower end places have beer lists on the menu and perhaps that's more your speed.

"3. Don't ever take the check after I've placed currency on top of it and ask if I'll be wanting any change. I'll probably change my mind if you do."

Just realize that there are also people who complain when servers don't do this. Some people want to get change and want to leave. I commend you for paying cash and your servers will appreciate it. Given that your check sounds like its in a plastic bin or on the table instead of a nice leather folio, I'm guessing it was more of a fast food place where you were eating.

"to a certain degree, many of these things are valid complaints, but the only way to avoid them is by going to restaurants with higher service levels, which are usually fine dining and more expensive."

In the end, this post should be on each page. Most of the complaints here are either the fault of other diners or people just insisting on going to low end chain restaurants. There are plenty of indy places that have quality food and service who struggle because so many people, such as those on here, insist on hitting Applebees instead. For many people, you don't have the right to complain about restaurants until you start showing better taste in them.