Why am I reading this... I should be working

You answered your own question, I see.
As to jams, I agree re Fortnum & Mason, but these days I really like the ones made by Forest Products. They have a stall at Borough Market, but you can also order them
online. They have a wide variety of both sweet and savoury and I haven't had one that would be a miss yet. Just opened a bottle of Garlic Pickle with Nigella seeds last night--yum!