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Female Platonic Friends Treated As Same Sex Couple At 5 Star SF Hotel

Female Platonic Friends Treated As Same Sex Couple At 5 Star SF Hotel

Old Aug 13, 16, 7:53 am
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Female Platonic Friends Treated As Same Sex Couple At 5 Star SF Hotel

I have taken a platonic female friend with me 2x to a 5 star San Francisco Hotel in the past several months, both times booking 2 beds in 1 room for events we were attending in the city. Previously, I have stayed at this hotel once before by myself.
I have the most elite status with the hotel's loyalty program and the bookings and bills were in my name only.
On our last stay, the hotel manager included my female friend's name on the card greeting me with my gift basket in my room that I receive for my status.
In the evening for turn-down service, only one of the 2 beds was turned down and 2 chocolates were placed on that bed with another note from the hotel.
I have no problem with same sex couples but I think the hotel is being very presumptuous.
I will be taking my boyfriend with me to San Francisco next month with a booking at this same hotel and of course we will be getting only 1 bed for our room.
I am actually concerned about being embarrassed in front of my boyfriend by a hotel staff member saying or doing something because the hotel has presumed my female friend was a romantic partner.
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Old Aug 13, 16, 8:11 am
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I think you are being presumptuous and possibly reading something in to what is not actually there. Nevertheless, when you do go there with your boyfriend, I think it's probably unlikely that they'll remember, or care.
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Old Aug 13, 16, 3:52 pm
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A good hotel should practice discretion and not make small chat about their guests partners from different visits. Also, it is SF which is fairly liberal about relationships, not just partnerships. Some guests are probably polyamorous or bi.

The comments here indicate a lot of couples book double rooms for amorous activities
http://onemileatatime.boardingarea.c...s-with-2-beds/
Perhaps the hotel's statistics skew towards two adults booking double beds are couples?

You could always call the hotel and just tell them you'll be arriving with your boyfriend, not your female platonic friend. I book travel for my partner and myself under my name and sometimes the details are mixed up. He's been called by my last name, his birthday cake had my name on it, staff wished me a happy birthday instead of him (but they had his passport info!). Sometimes it is better to clarify beforehand if he's the type who minds or would be put off by such mistakes. This isn't a double standard gender thing as I've also known women who ask to be addressed by a certain name or title as well. After all, they're (hopefully) not stalking you on social media so why would they know personal details?
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Old Aug 13, 16, 4:24 pm
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many properties (and certain restaurants and other hospitality/service industry) actually have standard operating procedures / policies of not referring to (friend) when you stay with (boyfriend) as well as when (friend) is not there.

this can go the other way as well, mistaking same sex couple for associates.

i would agree i think properties should not make assumptions, nor change a booking (bed type, etc) without discussing it with the guest, whether before or at arrival.

higher level properties (and they do not always cost more) often have better service, as well as better service recovery when problems happen. and problems can happen anywhere. good properties simply care when problems do happen.

Originally Posted by Suite Disposition View Post
I have the most elite status with the hotel's loyalty program

On our last stay, the hotel manager
you can clarify with that hotel manager

can always talk to management about anything
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Old Aug 15, 16, 1:12 pm
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I wouldn't presume any of that. I've traveled with my daughter and have had only 1 bed turned down. Not sure if it is a standard practice, but it's happened more than once.
As far as the welcome note, I'd take it as a nice service gesture welcoming you both to the hotel, nothing more.
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Old Aug 15, 16, 1:21 pm
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Originally Posted by kellio33 View Post
I wouldn't presume any of that. I've traveled with my daughter and have had only 1 bed turned down. Not sure if it is a standard practice, but it's happened more than once.
As far as the welcome note, I'd take it as a nice service gesture welcoming you both to the hotel, nothing more.
This.

If the hotel had assigned you a room with one bed, THAT would have been presumptous and over the line.
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Old Aug 26, 16, 1:33 pm
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I wouldn't worry about it. To be blunt, hotels are accustomed to dealing with people who bring their spouse on one visit, and their lover on another visit. Staff are trained to be polite and, above all, discreet. It is, after all, their business to make their guests feel welcome and comfortable, and absolutely not their business to pass judgment on the intimate details of their guests' private lives.
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Old Aug 30, 16, 5:06 pm
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The bedding mess up doesn't seem as bad to me as some of the other presumptuous stuff that goes on at hotels and can be rather insulting at that. You want presumptuous, then you should see what happens at some hotels when some couples -- more so "interracial" couples -- return to their hotel rooms late at night in typical night-on-the-town party wear. Hotel staff/security falsely flagging down the fellow guests as prostitutes or snuck-in guests exceeding room occupancy? Now that is a problem.
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