Treated Differently as an Asian Passenger
#31
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Morris County, NJ
Programs: UA 1K/*G, Avis Pres, Marriott Plat
Posts: 2,305
Really? Why?
I make sure I always say thank you to the flight crew on the way out the door... I appreciate the FAs' service, and for the folks in the pointy end, I appreciate that they've managed to preserve my streak of equal #s of takeoffs and landings.
That said, I'm proactive about it - I always say thank you, usually before they have a chance at the door. Maybe that's a strategy OP can try? See if you get a response... if you get a consistent grumble or ignored, there might be something to it. :-)
I make sure I always say thank you to the flight crew on the way out the door... I appreciate the FAs' service, and for the folks in the pointy end, I appreciate that they've managed to preserve my streak of equal #s of takeoffs and landings.
That said, I'm proactive about it - I always say thank you, usually before they have a chance at the door. Maybe that's a strategy OP can try? See if you get a response... if you get a consistent grumble or ignored, there might be something to it. :-)
#32
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#33
Join Date: May 2010
Location: AVP & PEK
Programs: UA 1K 1.8MM
Posts: 6,335
AFAICT, constantly saying "goodbye" and "thank you" or "Gesundheit" after someone sneezed just isn't a particularly common practice in all cultures, and maybe considered a bit banal.
Yet some might consider that rude. Just different cultures/upbringing.
I did notice this in Beijing for instance: I always say "thank you" and "goodbye" at grocery stores, yet I seem to be the only one ever doing so at the check-out counter.
Interestingly, this gesture is then always reciprocated - 100% of the time.
#34
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: WAS/TYO
Programs: AA PPro, TP Gold, UA Silver, Bonvoy/Hilton Gold, Global Entry
Posts: 296
Granted this wasn't in-flight, but I was on the phone with the 1K line a few months ago, trying to change my parent's flight reservation and apply GPUs to them.
I'd have done this online, but there was this whole thing with the website displaying a 2300 USD fee instead of 2300 JPY, etc.
Anyways, this took unexpectedly longer than I expected, despite feeding him the flight numbers beforehand. He must've been new because I could hear him reading off the commands on his screen, narrating what he had to do to himself. So at the 40 minute mark, I finally got to the stage of account verification.
One of my security questions (at the time) used to be: Q: What is your least favorite subject? A: Math
And after giving him my answer, the agent said
I laughed it off awkwardly, which must've given him the impression that I was comfortable with stereotypical jokes, as he followed it up a few moments later by humming the stereotypical "Asian riff."
I can appreciate that he didn't mean any harm by it, but it did leave a foul taste in my mouth after the call.
In-flight, I haven't noticed any slights against myself specifically. Obviously I've had bad crews on a flight, but nothing against me specifically.
That being said, I was sitting on the exit row SIN-SFO, when the air conditioning splashed condensation on me when we landed. My seatmate made some joke about Dr. Dao and having to "watch out for Asians" to me and the FA in the jumpseat, which I thought was in bad taste...
I'd have done this online, but there was this whole thing with the website displaying a 2300 USD fee instead of 2300 JPY, etc.
Anyways, this took unexpectedly longer than I expected, despite feeding him the flight numbers beforehand. He must've been new because I could hear him reading off the commands on his screen, narrating what he had to do to himself. So at the 40 minute mark, I finally got to the stage of account verification.
One of my security questions (at the time) used to be: Q: What is your least favorite subject? A: Math
And after giving him my answer, the agent said
You know, there's a joke in there somewhere...
I can appreciate that he didn't mean any harm by it, but it did leave a foul taste in my mouth after the call.
In-flight, I haven't noticed any slights against myself specifically. Obviously I've had bad crews on a flight, but nothing against me specifically.
That being said, I was sitting on the exit row SIN-SFO, when the air conditioning splashed condensation on me when we landed. My seatmate made some joke about Dr. Dao and having to "watch out for Asians" to me and the FA in the jumpseat, which I thought was in bad taste...
#35
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Another example is that in much of Western Europe (and especially Germany and France), it's considered rude not to say the equivalent of hello or good morning at the beginning of an interaction, for example when you approach the clerk in a store, when you enter a small establishment, or before you aska question at an information desk. Most Americans wouldn't bother this and would just immediately ask the question or order their food, etc.
#36
Join Date: Oct 2009
Programs: UA 1K, Hilton ♦ , Hyatt Carbonado, Wyndham ♦, Marriott PE, "Stinking Bum" elsewhere.
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My experience as a white female and flying on many different airlines for global corporations. Essentially ignored on middle eastern carriers, treated as second class citizen on Asian airlines. I typically flew business class. Female FAs typically treated me worse than male FAs.
I have always endeavored to be polite to all I encountered in my business career - from the cleaner to the CEO as we all.play an essential cog in the business world.. Being a female, white business executive it came with the territory in the 1990s through 2008. Did I let it upset me? No. Irritate me? On occasion. However, end goal was to get to my destination safe and alive. Always achieved.
Sorry OP has those experiences but if they are the worst thing he experiences in life he should be thankful.
I have always endeavored to be polite to all I encountered in my business career - from the cleaner to the CEO as we all.play an essential cog in the business world.. Being a female, white business executive it came with the territory in the 1990s through 2008. Did I let it upset me? No. Irritate me? On occasion. However, end goal was to get to my destination safe and alive. Always achieved.
Sorry OP has those experiences but if they are the worst thing he experiences in life he should be thankful.
I have several Japanese university professors who are very close friends of mine who actually prefer UA over other US carriers. I assume that they would've told me if they had experienced any discriminatory behavior, but I will be sure to ask them when I see them again in early OCT.
#37
Join Date: May 2010
Location: AVP & PEK
Programs: UA 1K 1.8MM
Posts: 6,335
I usually find it quite amusing, if I am in the right state of mind.
My wife, sitting in Polaris, once asked an FA for a beer so she could "go to sleep".
The FA replied with: "I could knock you out - that would make you go to sleep!", and proceeded to hand my wife a beer.
#39
formerly jackvogt
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Atlanta, GA
Programs: Delta SkyMiles,
Posts: 822
Obviously United hates Asian people. That’s the only logical conclusion to have....but of course if you have headphones on, are looking at your phone, etc they aren’t going to say anything to you.
#40
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: SAN
Programs: 1K (since 2008), *G (since 1990), 1MM
Posts: 3,215
Even when I am upset with United I explain to the CS rep my frustration is not with them as I know they did not personally cause the problem.
I enjoy some light heartened banter with the CS reps - we are all just trying to get through our day. Then again I an not easily offended by stereotypes. I am a middle aged white woman who is apparently not stereotypical for that demographic.
Someone greets/farewells me I respond. They ignore me and greet/farewell the next pax I move on with my day. If I wanted someone to greet/farewell me I would initiate the interraction if it were important to me.
#41
Join Date: Apr 2015
Programs: United Global Services, Amtrak Select Executive
Posts: 4,092
This is a really good take on what's going on, and I agree it's most likely what's going on here.
Don't get me wrong, I've almost always had pleasant interactions with UA FAs (when we actually get to speak with each other). Years ago when I started to notice this pattern of being ignored when deplaning I brushed it off as statistics. I also understand when deplaning there are many valid scenarios where the FAs need to take a break from saying goodbyes and do their job (which happens with any airline), so I appreciate the replies above confirming that not all passengers get a goodbye all the time.
To clarify, when deplaning I always look at the FAs and say thank you & goodbye with a smile regardless if they ignore me or not. However, there are so many cases where I notice the FAs put on a big smile and say thank you to passengers before and after me, which makes me start to question my sanity (and my appearance) after years of flying UA.
It's indeed a two-way street and everyone deserves to be treated with respect. And to Repooc17's point, maybe because UA FAs get ignored by so many Asian passengers, many FAs just subconsciously stopped trying. Maybe making a split-second decision to code switch based on ethnicity is just a technique most UA FAs ended up adopting, where DL may have specifically trained the FAs and pilots (I notice that DL pilots always come out and thank the passengers) on the etiquette.
Thanks for sharing. I'm so sorry to hear about your experiences.
I am indeed thankful to be able to live in a society where ethnic minorities are usually treated fairly and equally. This is definitely not the case in many developing nations and culturally homogeneous countries. That's also why I don't bring this up in real-life conversations because it's such a first-world problem (if it's indeed a problem).
Don't get me wrong, I've almost always had pleasant interactions with UA FAs (when we actually get to speak with each other). Years ago when I started to notice this pattern of being ignored when deplaning I brushed it off as statistics. I also understand when deplaning there are many valid scenarios where the FAs need to take a break from saying goodbyes and do their job (which happens with any airline), so I appreciate the replies above confirming that not all passengers get a goodbye all the time.
To clarify, when deplaning I always look at the FAs and say thank you & goodbye with a smile regardless if they ignore me or not. However, there are so many cases where I notice the FAs put on a big smile and say thank you to passengers before and after me, which makes me start to question my sanity (and my appearance) after years of flying UA.
It's indeed a two-way street and everyone deserves to be treated with respect. And to Repooc17's point, maybe because UA FAs get ignored by so many Asian passengers, many FAs just subconsciously stopped trying. Maybe making a split-second decision to code switch based on ethnicity is just a technique most UA FAs ended up adopting, where DL may have specifically trained the FAs and pilots (I notice that DL pilots always come out and thank the passengers) on the etiquette.
Thanks for sharing. I'm so sorry to hear about your experiences.
I am indeed thankful to be able to live in a society where ethnic minorities are usually treated fairly and equally. This is definitely not the case in many developing nations and culturally homogeneous countries. That's also why I don't bring this up in real-life conversations because it's such a first-world problem (if it's indeed a problem).
#42
Join Date: Mar 2017
Programs: HHonors, TrueBlue, Delta SkyMiles, Hyatt Discoverist, Starwood Preferred Guest, American Airlines.
Posts: 2,035
This is an awkward topic that I don't discuss with people in real life, but it's been bothering me a lot recently:
As an Asian passenger, why do UA FAs and pilots almost never proactively say goodbye to me when I'm getting off the plane, which from my observation differs from the standard etiquette between the UA FAs and non-Asian passengers around me?
As an Asian passenger, why do UA FAs and pilots almost never proactively say goodbye to me when I'm getting off the plane, which from my observation differs from the standard etiquette between the UA FAs and non-Asian passengers around me?
When the gas station attendant says "have a good one," instead of "have a nice day!" I don't get upset over it. I move on with my life because I have bigger issues to worry about.
Last edited by mikesyr18; Sep 14, 2019 at 2:04 pm
#43
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 10
I'm Caucasian, a woman, and over 60. I get the same treatment at times. It's like once I started going grey I turned invisible. As for the FA farewell as I'm deplaning, I tend to say "thank you" as I approach the FA and usually get a smile and a word in reply. If the captain is standing there, I'll mention the wonderful landing (if it was smooth). I've gotten a few surprised "thanks" to that from the pilot.
#44
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 111
I am white and have noticed that there are a good portion of flights that I take(mostly DL) that nothing is said to me until after I initiate. I always say thank you as I leave and have a good day/night. I spend most flights in J, but I always attribute it to me looking like I am 20. I feel as though not too long ago, it was common practice for whoever was standing there to say bye to each passenger.
#45
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: UK
Posts: 815
As someone who stands at the door saying goodbye, I try to say something to almost everyone. Occasionally I do take a brief timeout especially with certain passengers, who for reasons I don't fully get, walk up the aisle and out the door without so much as a lookup. Those passengers are less likely to get at "Buh Bye", "thanks for flying with us", "have a nice day" etc.
If you walk up, make eye contact and say something, anything, I guarantee you almost everyone in my industry will say something back to you. So I would ask the OP, forget about race for a second, what is YOUR behavior as you walk up the aisle towards those standing there? That would give us more information about what might be going on.
If you walk up, make eye contact and say something, anything, I guarantee you almost everyone in my industry will say something back to you. So I would ask the OP, forget about race for a second, what is YOUR behavior as you walk up the aisle towards those standing there? That would give us more information about what might be going on.
Whilst I have never given this issue a second thought until today, I believe the Raymoland’s comments are correct. I always make eye contact and smile even if nothing has yet been said. Without fail you will get a warm acknowledgement.