Was this possibly a replacement crew not used to this route?
I've had similar things happen, and I put it down to inexperienced crew unfamiliar with the plane and/or route.

Not wanting to admit their fault after "Jim" told the crew this was indeed a pajamas-flight, one of the FAs actually bothered to open an overhead bin and check, and 'hey presto', "We DO have pajamas!!".
A quick "What should we do??", "What should we do???" leads to the purser deciding to just hand them out.

My best guess...

So UA wants to compete on quality but when employees don't know their jobs, the response is to tell a HVC to take her business to a competitor? Wow. This almost should be a business school case study about how employees should not interact with customers, including bad hiring practices, bad training, and lack or consequences when an employee in a trusted position obviously behaves very badly.

Just to be clear: I wasn't agreeing with, nor excusing what transpired, only providing a possible scenario as to why it happened.

Just wow on both sides of the apparent dispute. Wow

wow, really can someone from customer service mail some PJs so you will have them for your next flight.

There's nothing like a good ol' pajamas thread on Flyertalk to guarantee a heated debate!
:D

United hater here. But I have to say, this is not the way I would have handled it --- particularly if I already had 4 sets of pajamas. I'm with UA on this one.

During boarding, everybody is rushing around and very busy. Many of the staff (FAs, purser, et al) are doing critical stuff so the plane can push back. A passenger who is demanding something trivial, and then insisting on going up the whole darned chain of command to get it, could actually delay pushback. And that's not even addressing the issue that the only cause to think you should get the pajamas is an obvious misprint. I would prefer that you fly El Al too, frankly, rather than have my flight delayed over a stupid set of pajamas.

If a fifth set of pajamas is that all-fired important to you, send an email to GS/1K voice etc. after the flight. I'm sure they'll give you enough miles to get a few pajamas. Sheesh.

To be fair, I've never kept the UA pajamas. (Why would I?)

It sounds like there's plenty of blame to go around here. OP's wife got awfully litigious about a phrase on a menu -- if you've spent that much on UA, you should know that they're not exactly known for their attention to detail in their in-cabin service, particularly on the menus. The purser certainly overreacted as well, though; telling a passenger to fly the competition should really be reserved for serious offenses, and I don't think kvetching about pajamas qualifies as serious.

OP: To answer your actual question: there's nothing you can do to convince UA to correct the crew's attitude, beyond reporting it and moving on. I mean, are you planning to picket the airport? Start an internet petition (hint: they do nothing)? You can move your business to El Al, but the chance that UA (a) notices and (b) attributes it to bad crew behavior is approximately zero.

Do you think that UA's SVP's have empowered the FA's to fire a GS or GS-like spend customer over their inquiry on the in-flight offerings of pajama-choice? Amateur branding at its worst.

What I usually do is ask for the pajamas at boarding, then after they say "yes we'll bring you some" wait an hour and they never bring them, then ask again after takeoff when they're taking meal or drink orders, then after they say "yes we'll bring you some" wait an hour, then walk up to the galley after we've had enough service and ask again and someone grabs one out of the closet for me. Pretty consistent.

If you don't get them during boarding your chances are that you will only get them after the meal. Once the plane is up the FA's are busy doing drink service and the meal. It's a battle to get into the restroom to change since the FAs are also beginning the drink service and a cart will be blocking the way. If you don't want to get your personal clothes gross during the flight I always ask for the PJ's during boarding.

Personally, I don't pack PJ's on trips where I know I will get PJ's on a UA flight and usually leave the PJ's behind in whatever hotel I stay in since they are so low quality. It's an easy way to save room in the suitcase and gives the PJ's a few extra uses.

I am someone who requests the pajamas as soon as I board. I like to get changed before the flight takes off (while the rest room is somewhat cleanish). It is like pulling teeth from some FAs. I also request the mattress pad. Again an item they need to find. The mattress pads get washed - the seat I am going to be lying on for the next 12 - 15 hours not so much.

The most amazing thing about the responses to these requests is that they need to find them. Now I am certain I do not fly as often as the majority of the FAs but my experience has been the pyjamas are in the cabinet in front of row 1 seats (could be either side so it does take a bit of a hunt to check each side) and mattress pads are in an overhead towards the back of the front cabin. As these hunting trips seem to happen each and every time I fly Polaris am amazed that United has not standardized putting the mattress pad out for every customer and placing the pajamas in the same cabinet on the plane.

I like to change into PJs before leaving the gate too. In fact, on SQ FAs seem to encourage this and expect that most passengers will do so.

Posting service problems here usually doesn’t achieve anything other than encourage unwarranted ridicule of attacks from fellow members.

OP’s wife should consider taking “Jim”’s advice. Then send a copy of the El Al invoice/receipt to Oscar with a very brief description of what happened. “Jim” needs a different role that isn’t customer facing.

Exactly. If something is advertised and promised, as a customer I would certainly expect it to be available. I also really don't understand those defending United when they fail to deliver something simple and basic. Sounds like Stockholm syndrome? When a crew do a great job, praise is due, but when a crew like this respond to customers in such an unprofessional way, they need to at least get extra training.