Originally Posted by IAH-OIL-TRASH

That's my cutoff. That pretty much results in "Sorry, that's my seat and I'm not interested in swapping". Once the offender is out of the seat, I also mention I might have considered a swap if he/she hadn't just presumed to take it. Hopefully it's a learning experience for them. I've only had to do this I think twice, luckily, in my years of flying. A couple of others seemed to have honestly misidentified their assigned seats (or are good actors).

Originally Posted by SFO_UGS

You get an "A+" for being polite and helpful. I would get an "F." It's not my responsibility to solve their problem. Once reason I fly United is that I can select my seat. And when I can't get the seat I want, I take a different flight.

What burns me the most are people who PURPOSELY seat in an unassigned seat and "pretend" they're in the right seat. Or worse, people who do the same thing in order seat next to their [insert wife, husband, mother, significant other] and then assume the person who is correctly assigned to the seat will say "OK" when that person boards the plane. Even worse, when the offender is a IK or GS and pretend to have that baffled look when you say "no." It just infuriates me! I don't raise my voice; I just say "no" with no explanation. No additional conversation from me is required or needed.

Long ago, when I said, "no," the guy half of the couple said he would speak to the FA. I laughed to myself. Yeah, right. The FA will ask me to move? I don't think so, but give it a try. :-) The wife ended up sitting next to me and I never saw him, again. On my recent Christmas bound SFO-IAD, the female part of the couple "pretended" I was in the wrong seat. She: "Oh. You're sitting on the aisle?" (757, first class.) Me: I just stared at her and thought: You know damn well your husband is in the aisle seat across from me and you're in window seat next to me. She: "Oh. We're traveling together." Me: Just stared. Husband: "It's OK, Mary. Let's see if the other person will switch." But what does she do? She sits next to her husband - the seat for which she is not assigned and when the guy who has that seat boards the plane, she doesn't ask, she says: "I'd like to seat next to my husband if you don't mind." The guy acquiesces. Argh!!!

Couples!!! The bane of my existence when I travel. :-)

Originally Posted by jp12687

you do not NEED to sit next to someone-- you want to. Your "want" should have been "planned" better.

Originally Posted by trm2

Now if you are in Y, the easiest reason to give is that purchases are paid by seat, not credit card. I was charged for a drink because I switched with my wife so the aisle seat I occupied was that of a general member, not a 1k (she didn’t get one). I know I could have called and had it taken care of, but I didn’t want to spend that much time on a $10 item. Yes, I only had the one drink.

Originally Posted by MojaveFlyer

Over the last almost two years of Covid now, there has been much reason to sit next to the person you are already exposed to than a stranger. I try to be sympathetic to that "want". And over my decades of flying, I have been grateful every time someone has done a seat switch for me, so that when we get separated (UG, IRROPs, etc) we can manage to sit together. I am a "planner" indeed, but sometimes things happen. Not saying I condone prematurely grabbing the seat you want, or trying to get someone to swap to a less desirable seat - when I have wanted to do that, I've offered to buy the party a drink, snack pack, whatever (which is even easier now with the contactless payment). So, thanks to all who have swapped at my ask.

Originally Posted by jp12687

I said no and to check if the other person wants to upgrade for more leg room and they sit in the back-- they got angry with me, yelled at me, and then proceeded to encroach over the shared armrest for the next 16 hours.

Originally Posted by jp12687

...I think I posted this in this thread several years ago EWR-HKG I always booked a bulkhead middle seat in first. That way I had direct aisle access and the larger footwell.

Originally Posted by threeoh

Serious question: for those of you who don't mind swapping like-for-like if asked nicely, but object to someone "poaching" your seat, what is the best way for the person who wants to swap to ask?

The one time in the past decade I've asked someone to swap (me + partner separated due to irrops), I just "perched" in his seat (bag on lap, didn't take my coat off)

Originally Posted by SFO_UGS

You get an "A+" for being polite and helpful. I would get an "F."

Originally Posted by nnn

Can't disagree with you there. Not only will you refuse a like-for-like swap (aisle to aisle) but you get annoyed at a stranger making a like-for-like swap? Um, ok.

Originally Posted by threeoh

I'd like more details here. Imagine you're in 25C and you want to be in 45C and give the guy in 45C your seat.

You sit in 25C and then what? Run back and check 45C every few minutes? Wait till the end of boarding?

(I agree if your partner is in 45B you can have them ask for you. If it's your 5yo, then...you leave your 5yo in 45B? Stand in 45C but don't sit down (even with bag on lap)?)

Originally Posted by SFO_UGS

No, it was not an aisle-for-aisle swap. Though, as previously written, that would appear to be the case. I fly a LOT. I find ways that I can control to make the experience less stressful and enjoyable. There's a method to my madness. :-) I choose very specific seats depending upon the aircraft with a goal in mind of being strategically located with a view to the lavatories. I drink only water and tea (no alcohol) and lot of it, so I want to be at the ready. In the previous example, I purposely flew a day later because the seats I wanted on the original flight were unavailable. Ultimately, that delayed my arrival into the targeted city. That was my choice and had no impact on anyone else. In my opinion, switchers think only of their needs and while a switch/swap might seem like a small thing, for some frequent flyers, it's a pain. Some couples (and those with children) often want the single flyer to accommodate their needs without regard to anyone else. Certainly, on United, if individuals want to sit together, plan for it. I do. And, if the person and their significant other happen to upgrade and are unable to sit together, deal with it. It's only a flight. My travel companions and I never seat together on a flight. We like aisle seats and if they are five rows away from me, that's OK. We'll see each other at the destination.

To be clear: I'm fine with people asking, but please, don't "pretend" you didn't know that wasn't your seat. Or, don't perch in the unassigned seat and assume your smile and good humor will get you the seat. Really annoying. :-)

Originally Posted by halls120

to everything in bold.

Originally Posted by abaheti

I never let my EAs book flights for me because I don't want to inflict my crazy preferences and willingness to take different flights based on the seat I can secure. I am totally (maybe crazily) willing to take a connection or less ideal flight because of my seat preferences mania. So, yeah, it does matter to me when someone presumes.